Garden Gnome humping

I have never met a garden gnome that I didn’t like, and neither did my friend Joe.  You know why gnome’s wear pointy hats?  Me either, but it seems like a good place to hold on to when you’re humping the crap out of them.  I bet the Travelocity gnome is pissed he never gets humped like this.

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Key West Humping, where is all started

Although my humping escapades did not originate in Key West, the name of the web site did.  Nothing says good morning like a drunk 20 something walking down Duval Street and yelling into a minivan full of kids that “I HUMP THINGS!”  One of my proudest moments.  I am sure the submitter in this hump did not go as far as I did, but I am sure she felt the same vindication.  I like that she has to be on her tip toes to get into a full humping position.  And look at the guy in the red shirt, he has no idea what to think about what he’s seeing.  This is what I love about humping things, bystanders never know what to think.


Fake palm trees need love too.

I thought about writing something really wity about this hump, but the person that submitted the picture I think said it best. 

“This is a weekend in Halifax, Nova Scotia, (home is St. John’s, Newfoundland). A closed mall after a movie one night. I caught him smiling at me while I was on the escalator. We shared a smile. He bought me a drink and next thing you know.. well.. when I returned to Newfoundland I had a baby. He doesn’t know. One day I’ll bring Palmy to see his dad.”

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Find a Golden Rabbit in London and let’s hump it.

A girl humping rabbit.  Does the rabbit love it?  Of course he does.  Who wouldn’t love a nice girl from the UK to hump them?  What I don’t get is why there is a golden rabbit with a red bow around it’s neck in the middle of London.  I guess if I saw the rabbit in the middle of a busy train station in London, I might be tempted to hump the hell out of the thing.

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Humping a Hippo

Did you know Hippo’s weigh up to 3 tons (insert your mom joke here)? The name hippopotamus comes from the Greek “hippos,” meaning horse; these animals were once called “river horses.” But the hippo is more closely related to the pig than the horse (insert your mom joke here). You ever wondered what it would be like to hump a hippo? I am sure most of us have a story from college that comes close, but this guy is showing us firsthand what it is like. And what is it with big guys in fleece vests and hiking boots? Hey man, you are at zoo, not on some Appalachian trail through hike. Anyway, I like the hump. It has all sorts of jokes that could be made, but I will leave those to you. Have a great Monday.

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Gorilla Humping

I get a lot of pictures of people humping gorilla statues, and they never cease to amaze me.  The gorilla is always in the perfect humping position.  I particularly like this hump because of the small infant gorilla on the back of the gorilla being humped.  It just seems so wrong, but it just feels so right.  gorilla_hump_ihumpthings

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Deer Humping Season

You gotta love the rednecks and white trash that put up lawn statues in their yard.  They really make for great humping opportunities, but I really do get why you would want a fake deer in your yard.  I can understand a garden Nome or even a bird bath, but what is the obsession with fake deer?  I just don’t get it.  Are you that into nature that you have to have a statue of a deer in your yard?  Maybe Jethro likes looking at it after he gets done banging his sister?  Maybe the statue of a deer helps wipe away the sin and memory of incest?  I really don’t know, but what I do know is people humping these lawn deer is pretty funny.

So let’s break down this hump of this poor defenseless deer.  This girl, I hope, is intoxicated and seems to be having a great time with our little friend here.  She has great form, but what really makes this hump great is the cigarette hanging out of her mouth.  The amount of concentration you must have to be able to smoke and hump at the same time boggles my mind.  Also please note her head is slightly tilted back as to say, “I enjoy this, thanks for taking my picture.” 

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Red Hot Chile Pepper Hump

Well, sometimes you get good humps, sometimes you get bad humps.  I will let you decide which one this is.  There is really nothing like seeing a girl on a Chile pepper, right?  I am pretty certain she is not the spokesperson for Chile’s restaurant, but by the looks of it, she seems to be a connoisseur of baby back ribs, chicken fingers and blue cheese.

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Pink Pig Hump

Well, what do we have here. You sure have a pretty mouth. Squeal like a pig! The movie Deliverance has nothing on these guys.  Ned Beatty is so jealous of you guys right now.  For all you fellow humpers out there wondering what makes for a good hump, well here it is.  Just 3 guys, a pig, a camera, and a good time.

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This is Awesome!

Here is a great humping video I found on youtube. Keep you eye on the guy in the red striped shirt. He does some crazy Euro trash dance, and then totally redeems himself when he starts humping the reporter. I love it. Thanks red striped euro trash man.

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Welcome to was established in the spring of 2001. We have over 500 photos posted, with hundreds more on the way. So sit back, browse the humping, and go take a picture of you humping something. Live the dream of humping, it’s the only way.

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